Top five: mondegreens (or misheard lyrics to you and I)

1. Misheard: Now, now we're old and fat. Real lyric: Now, now and hold on fast.
   Could It Be Magic - Barry Manilow
2. Misheard: Amphibian! Real Lyric: Oblivion!
   Oblivion - Terrorvision (This was actually JR rather than me but it's gone down in our history so had to be in the chart).
3. Misheard: Are you carrying a wet dog? Real lyric: Are you carrying a weapon?
   99 Problems - Jay-Z
4. Misheard: Like a goat in a stable. Real lyric: Like a colt in a stable.
   Blaze of Glory - Bon Jovi
5. Misheard: Young girl, with eyes like potatoes. Real lyric: A young girl with eyes like the desert.
   La Isla Bonita - Madonna